In the meantime, there are several options for couples who do not want to be married by a traditional clergy-person. The first option is to contact a minister from a Unitarian Universalist Church. They have chapters in most major cities. The Unitarian Universalist Church is very liberal. Their church doctrine leaves room for a lot of personal choice and interpretation regarding spirituality. U.U. church members consist of Agnostics, Atheists, Pagans, Humanists, liberal Christians/Jews, etc. The Unitarian Universalist Church is very supportive of couples designing their own marriage ceremonies. Oftentimes, U.U. ministers are willing to marry couples who do not belong to their church for a reasonable fee.

The second option available to people are the radical "churches" such as the Universal Life Church and American Fellowship Church. These churches were established in the 1950’s by political activists who wanted to challenge the sovereignty of churches in such matters as tax exempt status. They also wanted to challenge the emotional power structure of traditional churches with the clergy being set apart as having a special “in” with God. These churches are based on the concept that all persons are in touch with God, and are thus preaching their own gospel, or Divine truths as they perceive them. The founders of these churches challenge that this idea is essentially no different than clergy persons in traditional churches claiming knowledge of the Divine truth. Thus, the procedure for becoming an ordained minister of these churches is quite a simple one. You are sworn in by any other active minister of the church by committing yourself to an oath such as this:

"Do you _________ hereby pledge to commit yourself to pledging Divine truth as you perceive it to the best of your abilities, so as to raise the spiritual consciousness of your co-human beings?"

"I do."

"You are hereby ordained for life as a minister of the Universal Life Church, and as such, are entitled to perform all ministerial services such as babtismals, marriages, funerals, and to conduct church meetings. You are likewise entitled to all the privileges and considerations usually granted to a minister. You are also legally authorized to ordain other ministers into the church. You are also hereby authorized to establish your own parish of the Universal Life Church, which will be entitled to all the legal rights granted to churches in the state in which you live."

Note: A minimum donation is requested by the church for ordainment ($10.00) to help cover administration costs. (You can also donate more to help maintain these great organizations!)

Thus, one way to circumvent the requirement of having a government representative or traditional clergyperson perform your marriage ceremony is to become an ordained minister of these radical churches, and then ordain your best friend so he/she can marry you. This is how my husband and I were married. We both ordained our best friends, and had them sign our marriage license, and it was as legal as if the pope himself had done it! (You do still have to apply for a marriage license from the State, but you do not have to have a government official, or regular clergy person, perform the actual marriage ceremony.) I have included the addresses of these churches below in case you want to utilize this method for having your marriage legally recognized.

Contact these churches at:

Universal Life Church
21595 Sky Tanner Drive
Tucson, AZ 85730
or www.universallifechurch.org

American Fellowship Church
225 Crossroads Blvd. #345
Carmel, CA 93923 or www.americanfellowshipchurch.org